What is God’s will for me? How do I take the reins of self-direction on my path?

An image appears to me of the unique imprint on me “in the image of God.” Picture a globe, glowing white, with a surface of immense patterned complexity, like a circuit board, or the surface of a brain, or – the image that came to me – the surface of the Death Star, except inverted from black to white, and with a bright inner glow. This surface, this imprint is me as God’s will. It should be findable by me, if I sit in prayer and sincerely get to know the presence of God aside my being.

Here God is not be a supreme being, a divine person; my meaningful conception of God will be entirely personal to me (of course, the same access is available to everyone, equally uniquely to each); it is found only in that “image of God” that is me – that imprint, that template, which is all of what I was born with, the genetic heritage, the position of the planets and stars, the environment and family and culture and time, the formative experiences, the mind, the aptitudes and moods – all of that imprinted in a form that is love.

This “image of God” is the form, the imprint; it is the interface. It is a lot like my uniquely shaped brain, and more like my consciousness, if you just image these formations not as free-standing things, but as interfaces in contact with an en-forming shape without. And if you know that that shape is imbued as love. You must know it changes shape over time, even as it retains great continuity. This is the Presence. This is how I may know God.

I must spend time in my practice – let’s say, for now, Centering Prayer – if I am to know it. Not doing so has been my life before now. Mostly – not entirely – it has been a life of not knowing, too ignorant to try to know God, and myself. May this be my discipline, my healing, my way.

You’ve heard of the cosmic background radiation? The noise from behind the back row of the universe that comes from deepest reach of time? Very close to the Big Bang, found in equal strength from all directions, confirming for us our universe-origin story? Suppose that radiation is love. Divinity, God – not a personhood – can be seen as analogous to that.